Today I ask that the office takes a moment to recognize a true hero sitting among us in this very building we share.
As many of you know, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups are a prized possession in the workplace. The beautiful mix of chocolate and peanut butter wrapped up in a three-piece package is nothing short of heavenly as it sits in our vending machine, waiting to make the dreams come true for the next hunger stricken worker.
However, for some weeks now, that have felt like years, the divine candy creation has been held hostage… Blocked by not one, but two candy bars of a lesser quality— PayDay.
Nick and I have pondered for weeks on how to get to our beloved Reese’s. Our distress was growing to a severe level, we began detaching from society as we struggled with the losing battle against the tasteless PayDay.
And then he came! Matt, our savior. Matt sacrificed his palate and his wallet to jump on the grenade and save the rest of the office from eventually having to buy the two nutty defenders and release our beloved Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups .
I would like to make a movement to devote May 2nd as an office holiday, to praise Matt for his heroic efforts that could have very well saved the office from complete and total chaos.
Nick
I must say, thank you Matt. You have saved thousands of lives by doing this. We can all now enjoy the wonderful vending machine again.